Friday, January 7, 2011

New Year, More Stupid

Thanks to "Eric" for sending me this.  The following ad was posted in a local classifieds site ( and "Eric" thought the reference to "Reflexology" was funny (it is, but that's not the only funny part).

And by "funny", I don't want to neglect the FACT that there are real harms involved (check out - this bullshit can create unnecessary suffering and, at times, cost lives).

Here's the text of the ad:  (I re-bolded the headings and italicized it but removed pretty much all formatting - the links are all added by me and are for additional reading)

Simply Serenity Centre for Natural Therapies- NOW OPEN and Accepting New Clients

New Client Trial Offer: 30 min. treatment session for $10. 3 DAYS ONLY from Jan.18-Jan. 20. Call to book your appointment today!

What is Myomassology?
Myomassology is the ‘holistic’ version of Massage Therapy and includes many other bodywork techniques.

Holistic? What does that mean?
It means we assess your ‘whole’ body when designing a treatment plan. If you come in with neck and shoulder pain, we check to see if your spine, pelvis and legs are lined up properly. If you have one leg shorter than the other (for example) it will cause your pelvis to tilt down on one side and your spine to tilt down on that side too. Your body compensates for this by tightening muscles in your neck and shoulder area. This returns your spine to the vertical plane again but the cost to the human body of this correction is non-stop pain in your neck and shoulders. This is called the ‘Body’s Compensation Effect’. It causes tightness in your neck and shoulder muscles. This is an internal force you cannot fight because it is a survival technique. In this very common scenario, Myomassologists use techniques to release tight neck and shoulder muscles then restore correct leg length again to the short leg by releasing tension in muscles in the hips and low back area. Myomassologists treat the ‘whole’ body this way- that’s why they call us ‘holistic’. We view the whole body as totally inter-connected. It makes a lot of sense really.

Are you a Massage Therapist?
Yes and No.

What do you mean?
Yes we receive full ‘Massage Therapy’ training in school and, yes, we are fully accredited in ‘Massage Therapy’ by the largest professional massage association in Canada and, yes, we provide full ‘Massage Therapy’ services for our clients but we do not use these terms to describe ourselves because the words ‘Massage Therapy’ were trademarked by the Massage Therapy Association of Ontario for the exclusive use of their own members. We choose to call ourselves Myomassologists- to prevent confusing the public.

Do you do Swedish Massage?
Yes. In addition we perform Contraction Release Therapy and Leg & Hip Balancing when we want to get therapeutic results for our clients. These techniques are unique to Myomassology. We also offer Tui Na Massage (known as Chinese Medical Massage), Traditional Chinese Fire Cupping (an ancient form of Deep Tissue Massage, thousands of years old), Pregnancy Massage, Cranio Sacral Therapy, Reflexology and much more. Make an appointment with a Myomassologist today- feel the difference a Myomassology treatment makes!

Contact: .......... for more information.

Available Monday-Saturday By Appointment .

Additional Points

The leg length disparity test is dumb.  It is no different than what is done with Power Balance bands and is clearly a manipulation by the person doing the test.

With regards to "an ancient form of " and "thousands of years old" - remember, thousands of years ago, we lived half as long as we do now.  In about 100 years, we've increased the average lifespan by 50%!  If that crap worked, why didn't it correlate to a longer life?  (Many of these "treatments" that they claim are thousands of years old aren't even hundreds of years old.  Perpetuation of myths is not beyond quack practitioners, I guess.)

Reflexology when sold as anything other than a foot, hand or ear massage is an indication that someone (at least the person receiving the "treatment") doesn't understand biology or physiology.  It can't possibly do what they claim it does.

At least with Reflexology you are getting something (a limited massage) - Homeopathy gives you nothing and Healing Touch gives you neither healing or touch!


Anonymous said...

What do you call Reflexology on the Penis?

DJ EdgyB said...

Holistic Happy Endings? Hmm...

TartanTim said...

DJ: That can't be right because you aren't treating the whole person then.

Is homeopathy as dumb as it sounds? The less active ingredient the more potent it is supposed to be?

TartanTim said...

Does lambton county have a skeptics group?

RealityinSarnia said...

Yes, Tartin Tim but it is a secret society.

Yes, Homeopathy is total BS and is a scam. There is no evidence at all that it does anything more than a placebo.

Anonymous said...

I saw your tweet (DrRachie).

Cool that there is another skeptic from my hometown. Went to Northern and graduated in 89. Came to Australia for school and never left.

Powerbalance was exposed in Australia. We aren't all woo.

Aimee Martin said...

Ok... first of all, I am one of the Registered Myomassologists that you have blatantly criticized without any personal knowledge what-so-ever. So before you make comments that you cant substantiate, please do take me up on an offer for a treatment, then blog about it! At least have some knowledge before you open your mouth. I am registered by the largest massage therapy body in Canada... the Natural Health Care Practioners of Canda...and we recieve the same "D" designation as all the other community colleges, medix, etc... I have all my training in Swedish Massage, just like any other therapist you would see. Most insurance companies do recognize us, and the United States employs Myomassologists throughout their health care system. Myomassology originated from the US Association of Massage Therapists in 1972. Our massage is very hands on, and not spiritual or based on energy- although many find merit in those treatments as well. And No, we are not into making a quick buck, and again, get your minds out of the gutter because we do not perform that type of massage! In fact, why not ask one of the several nurses and other health professionals that have become clients because they were thrilled with the massage they recieved from us. So before you pass judgement, I welcome you to come in and have a massage...heck I will give it you for free...but you might be covered for your additional treatments by your insurance might want to check into that! :)